Archive for August, 2008

A Favre(ite) Moment

August 22nd, 2008

Kinda long story but gotta explain fo' get da "feeling" - I'll try and "jet" it along...

As I was warming up da bike last Friday ready to go home from work, I geared up and saddled da seat. (Funny, how come I can touch da ground now?) Hmmm. Balance da bike upright. (Eh! How come BOTH feet can touch da ground now?!) Take a look at da rear tire....

Flat. Sheesh kabobs! Supposed to be Feel Good Friday!

Wassap Wit Dat!

So I inspect da tire. Nothing. Roll it forward, check it out. Nothin'. Wat, some punk wen rock plug my tire? Nope. Some fricka' wen jus' let out da air? (no trust cause had my bicycle stolen last year and my bike pump stolen a few months ago). Maybe.

Wat I goin' do now? I no like call Da Wife (who went home real early cause she had some comp time) fo' come all da way back into town through traffic jus' fo bring all my tools in da truck. I wondah if I can make it to Lex Brodie's? All I need is air fo' now.

Vrrrrooooom. No can.

A couple co-workers pull by and ask if I need help or a ride.

"Nah. Can handle."

So I'm thinking thinking thinking. Oh! Lexus next door should have a portable air compressor. Walk on ovah and ask one if they get one. Da guy behind da desk nevah seem too interested. Den I hear one voice behind a wall.

"I think we have one. Eh, you're the guy that rides the red R6 right?"

"Yup. How you know?"

"I see you ride by everyday. I ride the blue R1 (pointing at his ride)."


They let me take the compressor back to the bike and as I'm pumping air into the tire, I try to find the puncture, if any, but couldn't. The salesman pops up out of nowhere and asks if I found the puncture. Nope. Then he asked if I checked for "rocks". Nevah have. Then he says, "you hear that?"


He finds a little puncture in the tread channel as air is hissing by.

Ok, jus' gotta fill up wit air and ride to da nearest Checkers to get a plug kit. No problem. As I get onto Nimitz I'm thinking, "geez, da puka stay in da channel, there's nothing slowing the air (like a nail head), I may not make it. Wat kine Feel Good Friday dis!?"

K-mart was coming up so I pull in and picked up one of the last two kits. Whew. Ok, air now. Fo' some reason, the closest one I could think of was Waiakamilo Chevron so I head there.

As I'm at da Bob's Bar-B-Que intersection I catch Firestone in da corner of my eye and notice they're still open (it's past six already - almost closing time fo' dem). Great! I'll stop there instead - plus if I need additional tools, they 'geef um.

I pull up to the side and notice a mechanic working on a car with a customer. No biggie. He finishes up and asks if I needed any help.

"Yup. I can borrow some air?" (looking at him sheepishly)

"Sure." (looking at me funny kine)

Looking at each other again as he's bringing da hose I glance down at his name tag sly li'dat,


"Coach Lance?"

Holy moly! I'm always ecstatic to see former players. Wat's even mo' amazing is dat I coached him about seven years ago. He's now one year out of high school, working and going to school trying to make something of himself.

As I'm plugging my tire we begin to talk. Let me jus' say dat wen I had Brandon he wasn't the "athletic" prototype. He was about 5'5 or 6", probably pushing 200lbs, not agile and looked like a teddy bear. I remembah his group cause most of them exemplified "heart". They were talented but it was their character dat moved me da most. Always willing to help each other, bus' their okole's, respectful and everything in between.

I still use their stories and experiences as examples for my players today. Let me share a quick one.

It was a playoff game and you could feel da tension from our team as they couldn't loosen up. I believe it was the third inning wen there was a high foul side pop fly towards the first base dugout. I remembah thinking it was out of play wen I see Brandon, playing first base, on his horse going for it.

I was lining up da ball and da fence (thin plastic orange ones) and it was going to be close. Next thing I know he's diving face first ovah da shoulder (THE hardest catch in ANY sport) right through da fence......... and MAKES DA CATCH!

WTF! Da whole team went wild!

They did loosen up aftah dat - we still lost - but I retell "Da Catch" every year.

Jus' as I was finishing up da tire, I was telling him how proud I was of him doing da things he's doing now - being independent, working hard professionally and striving fo' his goals in college.

He then thanks me fo' all da stories I told them and the lessons I've taught him because he's carried it through his time in high school - especially in football. He was mentioning dat da discipline and respect he's developed helped him do da things he does today.

I almost broke down right there (teary eyed as I write dis now - fo'reals).

Every season I do da Favre - contemplating whether I continue coaching or not - and while I still see many players that come back to visit every year, none touch me like da moment I had last Friday. I sincerely believed dat if I jus' could truly motivate and help one player it'd be worth it.... it was.... and then some.

So today I was thinking, wat if I nevah have one flat? Wat if I called Da Wife and waited? Wat if I caught a ride home? Wat if da salesperson nevah like help? Wat if I went to Checkers? Wat if I drove all da way up to Chevron?

I would have missed dat one moment.....


SHOUT OUT: Mahalos to Tony Thairathom at Servco Lexus used cars (right next to The Honolulu Advertiser Building) for helping me out with the air compressor!


(as quoted from Da Kine Dictionary & Pidgin To Da Max… wit a Braddah Lance twist)

(you no can pronounce dat, something wrong)

Haole Translation: Goose bumps

Use: Wen you get da "chills", or one ghost past through you

Sentence: “Wen I kiss Da Wife, I still get chicken skin.”

Sentence: “You can see da chicken skin on Bryan Clay getting his gold.”



Go USA!... Have Some Humble Pie

August 21st, 2008

I gotta say, I'm not a big fan of the Olympics but since the networks haven't been airing any new episodes or even good reruns of our favorite shows, we've resorted to watching the games.

We haven't been disappointed.... until....

Since when does making excuses and bragging become a part of it?

We've been watching the track and field events recently, and personally, am sorely disappointed in the actions of a few upon earning the gold.

Celebrate? Heck yeah! Stand proud? Of course.

But don't go on camera bragging or talking trash or just come off arrogant. Don't you know that you're representing your country? Not yourself - but about the hundreds of millions or people that support you.

Watching last nights men's 200m final was a prime example. Usain Bolt's performance was waaaay bettah than his 100m where he let up and showboated the last 10m or so. This time he actually finished the race and was more humble on camera (I wonder if he got "talked" to).

Then came Wallace Spearmon who came in third unofficially. He was celebrating and enjoying himself and about a five minutes in someone in the stands tells him he was DQ'd (disqualified). His face transformed in a heartbeat and it was just about his turn to be interviewed.

The interviewer asked what he was feeling and what he was going to do as they both were watching the many replays.

Spearmon: "Protest."

Interviewer: "Protest?" (said in a very surprising voice)

Spearmon: "Yeah, protest. What you gonna do?"

Uh, how about admitting you were DQ'd cause you broke a rule by crossing/stepping out of lane? The replay's CLEARLY shows it. You could sense an air of arrogance and it just turned me off.

There were other track and field athletes representing the USA that acted similar in their interviews boasting their accolades when taking the gold and it just didn't represent well, imho.

I'm not sure if you noticed, but for an event (track and field) where speed and high tech gear (skin tight clothes, streamlined glasses etc) is prevalent, there sure are a lot of people wearing BIG BLING.

Correction. There sure are a lot of USA runners wearing BIG BLING.

From thick gold chains (some wore two or three), fancy earrings and I swear what looked like a ten carat diamond ring, the US runners were sure bling'd out.

I thought the whole idea of running fast was to be as light and aerodynamic as possible?

Wassap Wit Dat!

Da Wife and I did witness an "Olympic" moment to put us back at ease.

It was the women's platform diving where 15 year old Haley Ishimatsu came in 14th... yes, 14th. It was her interview that knock us out. Well prior to her interview she was in the warming pool with a seasoned - and much older - Olympian Laura Wilkinson and they were enjoying the moment.

When Haley was being interviewed she literally broke down. It wasn't because of her 14th place finish, it was because of her first experience at the Olympics. Her attitude was about the games itself, not the medals. I'm glad NBC showed the clip right before because if it wasn't for that you may have gotten the wrong impression.

It was probably because she actually read and believed in the the Olympic creed:

"The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not to win but to take part, just as the most important thing in life is not the triumph but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered but to have fought well."

Maybe the track and field guys should take a look... but then again, they probably ran by it.


(as quoted from Da Kine Dictionary & Pidgin To Da Max… wit a Braddah Lance twist)

(hoo HOO)

Haole Translation: To be upset

Use: Wat you call someone who all salty

Sentence: “How come da Braddah make huhu? Silver not good enough?”

Sentence: “Keep calling in sick, you going make your boss all huhu li'dat.”


Posted in WWD! | 46 Comments »

(sing) Whose Got Da Funk...We Got Da Funk

August 20th, 2008

Have you evah been in one of those?

Whether it be a short lived hobby, cleaning da house (yeah, right) or watevahs - we got it.

On Saturday we attended a lunch time wedding, went home... and crashed. Not da car, on da floor... da couch has been "storage" for awhile so it was temporarily unavailable... fo' da past year.

It was a hot day, full stomachs and a lazy afternoon - all bad but in combination, no can win. By the time we woke up (night time already), the day (night) was shot and we ended up eating, of course, and watching Olympics.

Sunday came and it was a wake up call to get out of the lazy funk (which is hard to do) and get going. We actually had an early start going to the market, washing a ton of clothes, vacuuming, cleaning (we finally got a couch to sit on), dusting, playing with the dogs and believe it or not it wasn't even noon yet!

Wat now?

Hmmm, we'll cook. Yup, got into a cooking funk. She was baking some chocolate cheesecake muffin thingy while I played my PS3. Good trade yeah?  😉

Well our kitchen is too small for the both of us to be bumping elbows with knives in hand so of course I give way to Da Wife who can actually cook. Later in the afternoon her friend came over to work on her wedding invitations so the kitchen was finally free.

Wait. The Waipio (Waipahu) Little League game is on.... the kitchen is free.... wat do I do? Aaarrrrgghh.

(voices singing) Yooouuu got da funk... get outta dat funk. Repeat.

Errr. So I sulk my way to da kitchen.

Wat is it dat I'm cookin'?

Well not cookin'.... makin'. My mom has finally divulged her kim chee recipe to me - which I cannot share or distribute in fear of da Korean mafia - so I decided to take a crack at it.

Not too toot my own horn but da buggah was ono.... taste jus' like mom's... wait, it is mom's I just had to put 'em together.   🙁

Kamsamnida Oma! (Thanks eh, Mom!)   😀

So I brought some to work and now everybody is a guinea pig since they only they seem to enjoy is Da Secret Potato Salad and kim chee.... both not my recipe either.  🙁  At least I made it right?  🙄

Monday comes strolling along and I noticed my spare tire has been getting well... full sized iykwim.  😥  So wat made me notice? A frickin' scale at work - I was about seven pounds heavier!

Wassap Wit Dat!

Geez, if I was lifting again I'd be happy cause seven pounds of muscle is huge but it's off season and my cankle has put me out for over two months. Grrrrr!

Since Da Wife doesn't believe I used to have a six pack (even aftah shown a football photo but says couldn't tell cause had da helmet on) I hit da weights (easy in da beginning of course).

Yesterday, I finally hit da surf during lunch and boy did it feel good! Da cankle still not up to par but she handled welll enough and to make things shweeter... only had me and one oddah guy in da lineup. Righteous!

Then when we get home, Da Wife decides to make a banana muffin with cream cheese thingy (bananas was about to spoil) and I made a kim chee sushi roll with some added ingrediments (finally my own creation!) and it wasn't dat bad.

Sorry guys, I should have taken pics of everything.  😳

Today, is back to da weights..... we'll see how long dis funk lasts.  😉

(sing) Whose Got Da Funk? Admit yo' funk?



(as quoted from Da Kine Dictionary & Pidgin To Da Max… wit a Braddah Lance twist)

(mo MO na)

Haole Translation: Fat

Use: Make sure you can run faster than the person you're calling momona  😉

Sentence: “You should order da mini.”
"How come?"
"Cause you getting a litte momona brah!"

Sentence: “Eh, I no can believe you told da chick she momona!”



Posted in WWD! | 41 Comments »

Survey Says....

August 19th, 2008

All this talk about gas, transit and back to school traffic (starts next week so watch out!) made me ponder a bit.  I wanted to hold an informal WWD! survey... a game of sorts (for you MLC & O&E fanatics). I'll tally up the numbers hopefully at the end of the night and adjust accordingly for any later posts.

What I wanted to find out is this (and I'm sure it'll morph into some other added info):

  • Numbah of licensed drivers in da house
  • Numbah of vehicles owned (running and using - not da kine junkalunka kine sitting in da yard)
  • Wat kine you get? Car, truck, SUV?
  • If you have multiple vehicles, is more than one out on da road? (Eh, no cast judgement if all five on da road ok? Maybe they work different kine places or gotta do something aftah das why.)
  • How much (total) do you spend on gas weekly?

If you like add any oddah info, no shame geev' um.

And if you tink too personal, no need answer.

The City and County has done a current and projected traffic study (useless fact tidbit: dat's da two black tubes stretching across da road and everytime a car runs ovah it, da tally is added to da clicker in a box on da side in case you evah wondered wat da rubbah thing on da road was) and it doesn't look good but if gas prices get worse, who knows if it'll hold true.

Before we begin, I recall on a newscast a day or two ago dat recent car owners are now spending mo' on gas den their monthly car payments....

Wassap Wit Dat!

Survey says....

2 licensed drivers
3 vehicles: car, truck, motorcycle
Motorcycle to/from work. Car sometimes if Da Wife schedule changes or if rain. Truck on weekends.
Gas: Car - about $50
Truck - about $75
Motorcycle - about $20


(as quoted from Da Kine Dictionary & Pidgin To Da Max… wit a Braddah Lance twist)

(junk ah LUNK ah)

Haole Translation: Old, beat up vehicle - not in very good condition

Usual characteristics: broken something (window, door, etc), banged up, dented body or bumper, rust... but she still run and that's all that matters.

Use: describing one ole' buss' up car

Sentence: “Brah, cause you no take kea yo' car, came au' junkalunkah li'dat.”

Sentence: “Ho, shame you going take yo' date in your junkalunkah-mobile.”

I Pledge Not To Cheat

August 18th, 2008

In case you haven't heard, Hawaii is/was well represented in the Little League World Series from the famed Little League division (Waipio 11-12 year olds) to the Junior League division (Hilo 13-14 year olds) and last but not least in the Senior League divison (Pearl City 14-16 year olds).

Pearl City came up short failing to qualify for the semi's. Hilo did make us proud and made it to the World Series but fell to Curacao 5-2 in a very exciting game with the tying run at home. Hilo's power hitter cracked a deep shot to the warning track for the final out - literally inches short of a home run. And of course our Waipio Little Leaguers... still alive and guaranteed a spot in the US semifinals beginning Wednesday trying to repeat what the Ewa Beach Little Leaguers did just three years ago.

In Sunday's game, Waipio beat Florida 10-2  and it was the first Little League division game I seen this year (had the DVR set in case I missed this one and I'm glad I didn't - heckuva game!) but one thing I noticed in particular was the bright yellow patch above the normal Little League patch on the left arm:


In case you can't make it out it says, "I WON'T CHEAT!"

Wassap Wit Dat!

Granted the past handful of years have gone with some speculation and guilty teams of having ineligible players playing but it isn't the players who cheated... it was the coaches/adults/parents!!!

I cannot believe that the Little League would have a patch like that so brazenly sewn on the arms of the keiki when the kuleana solely goes to the adults. The parents should be aware of the district and age requirements. The coaches review the applications. The director(s) review the roster compliance's.

What does da keiki do but suit up and play where the parents sign them up to play? A keiki doesn't know how to cheat.

A keiki learns to cheat from the adults wanting their kid to shine. A keiki learns little "dirty" tricks from people who show them. A keiki mimics the attitude and sportsmanship display of those who are with them hours on end.

I was curious as to why the patch is on. Nothing from the commentators - which is rare because stories of interest are usually repeated throughout several games - and believe it or not, nothing from the Little League site(s) themselves (I've tried searching and Google'ing for over an hour). All I could find was that it's part of a program started by former major league slugger Dale Murphy inline with his foundations slogan of "Injecting Ethics into America's Future" and that was on some San Diego forum.

Unless the whole idea of the patch is for keiki to "step up to the plate" and recognize what is right an wrong then act accordingly?

In my 15 years of coaching I've seen the gamut of coaches from those who don't know anything about the sport but coach to help out to coaches who only care about the "W" but following the rules solely rests on the shoulders of the coach.

I for one have experienced a few incidences where there have been ineligible players playing against us. Parents actually forge their son's birth certificate or use the infamous "aunty or grandparents address" so they can play. I have turned away players because they were "out of district" and referred them to the proper team or those who missed the cutoff date by one day (yes, it has happended to me three times) I had to say sorry, no can even after they plead their case.

There are also times where the rules are a little gray - and people push those quite often - but if a morally right person were to follow the intent, there would be no gray.

Too bad the world doesn't work that way.

It reminds me of the Scarlett Letter... only the "letter" is on the wrong person.


(as quoted from Da Kine Dictionary & Pidgin To Da Max… wit a Braddah Lance twist)

(koo lei AH na)

Haole Translation: Responsibility, job

Use: To point out one's responsibility or duty

Sentence: “It's da coaches kuleana fo' make sure da team legit.”

Sentence: “It's da keiki's kuleana fo' get to practice.”



Posted in WWD! | 38 Comments »

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