Nobody Drives Da High Road
By Braddah Lance
A couple blogs ago on No Talk Stink If You No Mo' Facts there were a few readers dat suggested I take da "high road" not needing to justify myself to an - imho - ignorant comment.
But why should I or anyone else for da mattah?
If someone speaks ill of you, would you seriously stand idly by? Would you allow your name and character to be dragged through da mud? Wen someone talks stink about you, you can either eat $h!t or clean yourself up.... I like to be clean.
It's not about lowering one self to the level of the idiot, it's about educating them.
Why would you allow a person who belittles you to feel like they got da upper hand on you? If aftah speaking your peace, dat person wants to ignore da "oddah side", then so be it but until then, how would dat person know if s/he doesn't have some/all of da facts? Surah there are some really uneducated, ignorant and biased people out there and das why they have to at least be presented with - obviously da information dat they don't know - and then let them decide whether they feel their comment(s) holds true or not.
I understand about people backing people up but dat only works ideally in certain situations such as a small group or face to face. Wen it happens in cyberspace wea who knows how many people read, those readers can read it and then leave wit their own impressions not evah knowing/hearing da oddah side. All they hear is da crap and if you hear enough crap without using toilet paper, you're okole still carries da stench which is still smellable from da road below.
How do you tink elections are won? (Wassup Wit Dat!)
While people close will always try to set da record straight, if it doesn't come out of your mouth eventually, it doesn't have da same effect. So wen someone decides to spew crap all ovah me, you bettah believe I going defend myself. Call me old school but I still firmly believe dat one's name and character is stronger than oak.
By responding, how do I give credibility to da nay sayer and lessen mine? If anything, I believe I strengthen it as those who don't know me, get to know a little more about me and those who do know me, are reaffirmed dat I'm da same person. Now if aftah speaking your peace, dat person still wants to continue biasly, then das his/her perrogative but without at least putting da oddah side of da mo'olelo out there, da high road is a very lonely road.
Really, wat would you do?
Or you no like use toilet paper?
Wassup Wit Dat!
September 12th, 2012 at 6:18 am
Howzit BL!
You gotta do what you believe iz da right ting to do to you, not wat oddah people tink.
September 12th, 2012 at 6:58 am
Whateva road you drive on,,,just no drive down the "lolo" road.
September 12th, 2012 at 7:08 am
"Now if aftah speaking your peace, da idiot still wants to continue being an idiot, then das his/her perrogative but without at least putting da oddah side of mo'olelo out there, da high road is a very lonely road."
Agreed. If after you speak your peace and da idiot CONTINUES......then its time to just disengage as a PISSING MATCH will surely follow.
September 12th, 2012 at 7:17 am
I respect what you say, BL, but I still disagree. If you do what you say, then you'll always be a perfect target for Internet "trolls". People who make comments just to pee you off and screw around with the quality of your blog. The best way to handle these ignorant people is to just ignore them. When you ignore them, they don't become a part of the discussion - they become insignificant.
In face-to-face encounters, I also try to take the "high road". It isn't always easy, but I do my best. A couple of months ago, I was riding with my friend. We were looking for parking at one shopping center. As we were circiling around, these two Caucasian guys were walking right in the middle of the road, taking their time. My friend honked his horn, the two guys glared back, and slowly moved to the side. As we passed them, one of the guys continued to stare at my friend. My friend told him, "WHAT!?!" The guy looked away. I told my friend, "Would you have honked your horn and said 'What!' if they were two huge Samoan guys?" He said, "Of course not." I told him, "Then why did you do it to them? You should just be patient. What's the big deal if you have to wait a 15 sec for them to walk to their car?" I told him, "If you're gonna be a punk, then be a punk to EVERYBODY. Don't size people up before you do something."
September 12th, 2012 at 8:02 am
I believe that you have to educate people of the facts first when people are critical of you without knowing the facts. If people choose not to listen or are some of dem internet trolls who are only interested in trying to bait you into an arguement then maybe that's the time to step back.
September 12th, 2012 at 8:47 am
BL,
I close this discussion on my end with this saying, my brother: you can lead to horse to the water, but you can't make it drink.
You will do as you always do, it's your nature, and no one can stop you from doing that.
I have dealt with many situations like the one you have described. In the end, the idiot usually approaches me later and thanks me for being a gentleman and not being an idiot like he/she was. This is hard to do and it takes practice. In the end, you end up the winner in the eyes of everyone, and in your case, in the eyes of the person who likely matters the most - your little one.
I will continue to read your blog because I enjoy your ranting and raving about idiot parkers. Aloha, BL.
September 12th, 2012 at 9:39 am
let out your steam... bettah to let it out than keep um inside... main thing... you live your life just as you say... no bs... straight forward... you the man!!! just listen to your heart... you doin ok!!!
September 12th, 2012 at 9:46 am
Seriously? I don't think what you said in response to the lolohead constituted "being an idiot like he/she was," as @Parent of former player called it. But I highly doubt I would have given the person who said a few dumbass words about you as much of my time as you gave him with your response.
I figure my time's precious & if some lolohead wants to make 'a' by saying I'm not this or that & they don't even know me, that's his problem, not mine.
Thing is, everyone that knows you as "Coach" knows your heart - you wear it on your sleeve. Most likely, if you had not responded - or had responded with something funny kine - plenty people would have just
at the guy's stupidity. Now they get to pass all kine judgement on you, which is nothing more than opinion - and you know what they say about opinions. 
September 12th, 2012 at 9:54 am
I suppose that because you are a writer you have to write something. But for me it's not worth the finger strain, emotional stress or the breath to speak to respond to idiots.
September 12th, 2012 at 11:39 am
Good subject matter relating to idiotic name-calling or whatever you may want to call it. Name-calling never solved any problems. Ego or pride, choose your pick, the two reasons why encounters occur. Avoiding confrontations is the easy way out, and keeps your sanity. Brooding over idiotic issues never has any benefits. About the only thing it relieves is possibly stress. Non-response to the "name-callings", the passive approach is worth exploring. The benefits are overwhelming in its favor. Serenity and love is superior to anger and hate. There are many who would choose the non-confrontation route rather than the drastic route, which only has few rewards, with your ego and pride intact. Been in your shoes many times, and regret all the retorts that was vented. Peace, serenity and love over hate, anger and *U?!~~~*^.
September 12th, 2012 at 11:52 am
... hey Braddah Lance ... circumstances dictate whether or not you could or should take the high road ... the manini issues in life are easier to take the high road ... but not everything is manini ...
... I also think that you being a "semi" public figure changes things ...
... I say you have a voice ... why not use it??? ...
... I say you have your own mind ... you don't have to conform with others ...
... and you're never going to agree with or please everyone ... so why even worry about it??? ... do as you would normally do ...
... Have a Good One Everyone!!! ...
September 12th, 2012 at 1:58 pm
BL, what the 411 on the people who no kan park da car properly, li dat? Any pickchas? Show em.
September 13th, 2012 at 4:56 am
Parent: check previous blog entries for pickchas of peeple who no can park correctly. Get plenny. Aloha!
September 13th, 2012 at 7:29 am
Guud morning BL!
September 13th, 2012 at 9:36 am
You gotta stand up for yourself. You did the right thing BL. I also agree with OL's comment 100%.
September 13th, 2012 at 2:11 pm
Just my opinions as a fellow long time reader....Nothing wrong with standing up for yourself and setting the record straight, or responding on your style as a coach. I agree that the original comment was uncalled for. The part I don't agree with is calling the commenter an "idiot" or "lolo" or any other name. I think that is where taking the high road comes into play. Calling people names then also encourages other commenters to follow suit and we then tread a fine line into cyber bullying, etc. I'm not saying it has entered into that territory here, but as a reader and sometimes commenter I would like to feel that I could voice my personal opinion without being called any names.
I have the utmost respect for what you do as a youth coach and I will continue to read your blog.
September 13th, 2012 at 2:45 pm
E Komo Mai back pink lady!
Mahalos for sharing an obviously overlooked point of view. Point well stated and I have edited da original blog to reflect da change.
That is true dat I did lower myself by labeling and das wea my emotions got da best of me but I could have called da commenter worse and I'll do dat in private.
But I'll put it out there though dat I'll nevah stop calling those parking pricks, idiots.
Or anybody else who behaves in a fashion to label themselves watevah label they acting like.
And no, I nevah fo'get about everyone else and I going get back to you all but pink lady's comment was right on and like I've said before, wen someone points out something dat I was wrong about, I'm man enough to admit and do wat it takes to make it right.
September 14th, 2012 at 10:43 am
Thanks BL!