Some Get Chance... Some Need Chance

January 7th, 2014
By

Da Sunday before Christmas, Da Wife and I were running some errands at Kapolei Target and decided to pick up lunch at Subway's before heading back home with two tired out keiki.

We took a look inside and it was packed so Da Wife stayed outside with our little ones sleeping in da stroller while I went inside to stand in line..... or at least tried to. Before I could even get in, there was a girl about four years old watching me approach da doors and decided to be gate keeper and keep me out. While she had her kung-fu grip wrapped on da handle, she leaned back for leverage to keep it shut and I waited for her parent(s) to either scold her or tell her to move.

A'ole.

I waited a few moments more till her grip slipped then I yanked da door open quickly and said, "excuse me" as I had to still walk around her just to get in. I spotted her mom with three oddah siblings and was already shaking my head having "profiled" them by their actions and mannerisms. Aftah a few minutes, classic me, I fo'got Da Wife's order so I went back outside to confirm wat she wanted. Aftah da eye roll, I was expecting to muscle my way back in wen I noticed dat da gate keeper wasn't there. As I grabbed da handle to open da door, I heard a shriek behind me noticing a haole lady with a motherly-I'm-not-letting-go-grip around da girl's arm.

Da little girl was literally a foot from being run over by a Chevy Tahoe as she just decided to saunter into da parking lot. Da haole lady was startled by wat almost happened as she looked all around for her parent in disbelief. Da mom nonchalantly walked out to her, grabbed her kid and walked back into Subways. No mahalo. No scoldings. Nada.

Wassup Wit Dat!

You could tell by those who witnessed it, we all muttered da same thing, WTF! Da haole lady stood there for a moment before realizing there wasn't anything left to do but her face said it all as it painted well more than a 1000 words.

Inside da store, da mom picked up their tray and threw away watevah was on da tray cause watevah was left off da tray, stayed.





Had more lettuce and small pieces of bread on da ground, she nevah move da tables and chair back and how you see it, is how she left it. Classy yeah?

As they left, I continued to watch them as da mom just lead da way sashaying her okole practically walking in da middle of da lane without once making surah her keiki was still there. Luckily three of da four keiki was following without a care in da world but da gate keeper? She decided it was "her" world and it was more fun to zig-zag her way through a congested area trailing about 10 yards behind da mother of da year.

In da pic below was da first time da mom looked back and in fact once she saw dat da gate keeper was still there, she turned and jumped into their truck waiting for da little one to climb in.





On da flip side - yes at da same store at da same time - there was a potagee looking dad who couldn't have been more than 22 or 23 with his not more than three year old daughter. Wearing a tank top, tat's all up and down both arms and not looking "friendly", you couldn't help but "profile" him in a guarded way.

Wat impressed me was da fact dat he was talking to his daughter both as a father and a person. He warned his daughter not to touch da soda fountain counter cause it was "dirty" and of course, she did. He didn't go ballistic or scold her in a demeaning way, he was actually stern but nice about it as he was cleaning her up. You'd tink it was a show cause he was in public but there were oddah things - small things - dat he did dat you wouldn't have expected from a person like "him".

As I grabbed my sandwiches, we made eye contact and I just gave him a respectful Wassup nod as I headed towards da exit. It's amazing how some keiki are given a chance and oddahs are just left to fend for themselves and then you understand why people act and do wat they do. I can only imagine dat in dat braddah's life, there was at least one person who showed him how to act and be and now he's passing dat on to his keiki.

Da odds aren't da greatest but at least from those five keiki, I know dat there's one dat get chance... and I'll take those odds any day.








Posted in WWD! | 11 Comments »

11 Responses to “Some Get Chance... Some Need Chance”

  1. wafan:

    Feeling sad for those kids. They may or may not be part of the problems of the future but they are certainly not being given a good foundation. The dad sounds like he is doing a good job.

    Just really goes to show cannot looks can be deceiving.

    Would hate to have the mom's kids in class. No support, respect and discipline from home.


  2. roach:

    BL,

    Unfortunately, the mom with the four kids was probably raised in the same manner (or lack of manners) as she exhibited with treatment of her kids. And the breeding of bad mannered, disrespectful people goes on and on.


  3. Glenn D:

    Hau'oli makahiki hou, BL! It really irks me when I see moms like dat with 3 too many keikis. It's always da ones that cannot even take kea of one to have 3 more. And wea's da father? Hawaiians have a thing called 'hanai' especially for moms like dat. But she probably neva had da support wen she was growing up and no have now too. But why she no have respect for oddahs, I no can understand. Is she that lolo that she no can figure out da common courtesy? Makes me angry for her to put da keikis in that spot. Dem keikis are already at an disadvantage at such an early age. As for the potagee father, I too would have 'profiled' him with da tats but just maybe he learned from his mistakes and wanted to give his keiki a mo beta chance than what he got, yeah? And just maybe, like you said, he had a good mentor.


  4. Shawn211:

    Pretty sad but that's the truth out dea!! One night I was grocery shopping at Safeway (Kapolei) was around 9:30 pm. coming home from work, and out of the blue came this little kid knocking on my window selling me "Worlds Best" chocolate covered almond candies which I swear was must have been all ready melted since it sounded like it was all stuck together. This kid barely reached the height of my window so I'm assuming he must have been in 1st or 2nd grade. But I'm thinking where are his parents??? Letting a child run around a dark parking lot at 9:30 pm selling candy for his brothers football team. Then I see his mom sitting in a beach chair with her big gulp 7-11 soda on the side with her eyes close sleeping with the 3 other kids playing with the shopping carts....


  5. lowtone123:

    Dat "parent" probably had her "parents" did da same ting. Ainokea, do wat you like but if you no listen to me you goin get cracks. Dis kine of stuff gets purpetuated from generation to generation. Me I scold my kids all da time but I also let dem know why I scold dem so they know right from wrong. Some have told us "ah, let dem go, dey just being kids". My wife and I want our kids to grow up to be respectful and curteous. The foundation of life begins early and is a continuous process of lessons and learning. I tell my kids you never stop learning even when you are an adult.


  6. Ocean Lover:

    You forgot the dialogue between the mom and kids. I betchu had plenny "F-words" sprinkled throughout. :-(


  7. buddahbelly:

    BL, We moved out to Ewa a couple of years ago after living in Kaneohe for more than thirty years. Believe me, it was culture shock seeing how some of these people on the "West Side" behave. Not that there wasn't bad behavior in Kaneohe, but there just seems to be a lot more of it out here. All you can do is shake your head.


  8. cojef:

    Love your story about the pitfalls parents face in raising their keikis, on good an da ughly. My own experience is raising my own son. He no smoke eva and he is 52 years old. While growing up and riding car wit me, and wen we see someone smoking and driving, I say look, look the stupid person with cancer stick in his mouth, repeated ovah and ovah on each incident. That kid nevak played with paklolo or any other drug. tat's the truth.


  9. Ynaku:

    No mo da kine tats and stuff but I teach my children and grandkids to be respectful. Shake My Head when I see disrespectful people of all ages.


  10. Glenn D:

    Eh BL, saw one that made me shake my head dis morning. This popolo guy was waiting for da bus by the bus bench. Da rubbish can is next to da bench, maybe 1 foot away from him. He had a candy wrapper, sees da bus coming , stands up, throws da wrapper on da bench. Argh! Just too leazy to take one step to put da wrapper in da rubbish can. No can understand why...


  11. 9th Island Girl:

    Good thing the kids get angels like the lady that saved the girl from being run over. It must be overwhelming to have that many young kids.