Idling By

June 18th, 2014
By

Wen I post a blog about certain situations I encounter (or how some readers say I put myself in), I'm perplexed about how such comments come about. There are comments telling ("encouraging") me to think about my players or da safety of my own keiki but wat they fail to realize is dat I do.... I ALWAYS do.

There was a particular comment about a month ago:


Next time, just call 911 and be done with it because:
● you have a baby now. Baby is the priority.
● if the guy is so bold as to do the . . . seeming out-of-the-ordinary things that he did . . . ask yourself, what else might he be prepared to do.

It's not about not doing anything. Just call 911 and be done with it. Don't go until something happens to you. You're not Batman.



Wassup Wit Dat!

How can I - or anyone - in good moral conscience - watch and/or stand by when there are things going wrong? It's the very thing I teach and preach to not only my players but to my daughter and later my son once he's able to. How can I say it's the "right thing to do" while standing there literally doing NOTHING? And to be "done with it"??

I tell the players this every year:

It takes much more of a man to stand up and stop what's wrong than it is to stay on the side and only think about it or keep it to yourself or worse yet, only "talk" about it. You should be able to stand up to a friend and tell him 'nuff already or stop something you feel is grossly wrong BUUUUUUUUT hea's da catch, be prepared to defend yourself even to da point of getting your okole kicked because no mattah dat da right thing should be done, da oddah person obviously is more right than you at dat particular time.

Wen your friend(s) get teased and s/he isn't laughing, step in. If someone is getting pounded and you tink they had enough, stop da fight by holding back da person getting beat (if you hold back da person who's doing da beating, they may take it as anoddah fight). If you're able (feel safe enough) to approach strangers who are doing something not right, then God be with you and stand strong.

Too much has society been standing "idly" by. Take a look at Talia in da previous blog. If there was ANYONE who had contact with her and thought even for a second she needed help and didn't do anything about it, you tink they no feel sick to their stomach right now?

So to each their own. Stand up or stand down. Pick your battles and be prepared to defend them. Be prepared to get your okole kicked. Be prepared to do da right thing. I'm not Batman nor any superhero for da mattah, I'm just an ordinary person who believes dat doing da right thing is more than a punchline or just something you say but please don't ask/tell me to stay idly by when a wrong is being done right in front of me and there's something that can actually be done.

Aftah "evaluating" things, surah things could have been different as well as da outcome but at dat moment you not tinking about results or procedures, it's about just stopping da wrong. Can you (I) help in every situation? Hell no! Not even superheroes can do dat but I'll do wat I can wen I can.

For those who preach to "watch", da next time you are being wronged, don't cry out for help or expect a stranger to appear out of nowhere and lend a hand in support. Don't wonder why people continue to walk by staring and not a soul offering comfort while you wait for "help". Don't ask how come nobody did anything wen they saw someone breaking into your home or car. No cry foul when your wordly possessions are stolen from you. No talk stink wen someone you love is being hurt and no one lifted a fingah..... but did dial 911.

I'm not out there trying to make everything good nor do I need to. Things you can do, you do and obviously things that may cause harm to you, proceed at your own risk depending on da situation. It boils down to wat YOU want out of life and can do about it. If you da type dat only lifts a fingah to dial 911 or just stares as crap happens then so be it, nothing wrong about dat but no "scold" me for lifting more than a fingah wen I got nine oddah fingahs and ten toes dat'll step right in.

While I'd like to believe dat we all want to do right, how passionate are you about it? Have you evah done "right" and have it blow up in your face? Have you evah regretted not having done something to help? Have you been on da oddah side looking for ANYONE to help and no one did - how you feel about dat?

Those who think will not act and those who act will not think..... sadly, both sides agree on one thing........

Da oddah side is "wrong".








Posted in WWD! | 9 Comments »

9 Responses to “Idling By”

  1. kamaaina808:

    First, cuz someone @ STARBUX gave me full-caff instead of half-caff @ 6PM... 8-O

    (Happy belated Father's Day, BL!) :-)

    I have done something 'right' that could've really, really backfired & got me killed. Luckily, I only got hit (open-handed) in da face & that was it. I didn't fight back cuz I was so shocked that the guy hit me in the first place. :-P

    But one oddah time, I did something 'right' with a train-load of people around me who did nothing, and thinking now, yeah... it was lolo, but heck - it was so dangerous I had to do something.

    LONG time ago was on the BART (was coming from a football game on a Sunday so the train was PACKED), going through a tunnel from Oakland to SF, and this guy lit up a cigarette & started puffing away on it. Not one single person said squat to him, so I looked at him & was like, Brah - you serious? Put that out! Smart-A that he was, he just blew smoke in my face. Now, not too long before, one train caught fire & burned, and I wasn't ready to go that way so I reached up (yeah he was taller than me), yanked the cig from his mouth, tossed it on the floor in front of him & stepped on it, putting it out. He glared, but did nothing in retaliation. It was really odd being in a crowd like that but no one saying or doing anything, like they was all scared or trying to be all PC or something... no rock da boat, or watevas.

    It might've been the 'right thing to do,' but certainly not without personal risk. But I look at it this way: If the train caught fire from this stupid-A & his bad habit, I'd be hating myself.... or worse.... for not having done something.

    Some people no can handle getting involved; some can, but I'm nobody to tell you or anyone else if no can or can. We all gotta live our own lives & deal with the consequences.


  2. wafan:

    I always ask my kids to think and decide if they can live with themselves if they know they could have stopped violence or a vile act but chose to do nothing. For years one of the examples I used to provide was strangely similar to what happened to Talia. This year was no different except that the little one had a different name.

    Most often the kids individually decide to step up and step in. I am hopeful they chose to willfully and positively act to correct any situation.

    No, BL. You are doing the right thing. We need more folks to take positive action to stop the buffonish and boorish behaviors of bullies who believe they are not and will not be held accountable..

    Bravo!


  3. M:

    Howzit BL!
    Every situation is different and sometimes you just react and sometimes you don't. I never gotten into a situation wea I had to step in to break up a fight or stop someone doing someting dats not right. I have helped people in need like someone that gotten hurt or injured.


  4. Lowtone123:

    Mahalos for watching out for your neighbors. You pretty akamai kind of guy you wouldn't put yourself or anyone else in imminent danger. I have in the past broken up a fight and another time stepped in when I saw a guy yelling at his wife at the store. I told him that this wasn't the time or the place and he needed to step away and cool off. Fortunately, he agreed and it didn't escalate further. Other times I have helped when people have fallen and injured themselves, either offered help or called for help. One day I may need help and hope that help is offered to me when I may need it most.


  5. cojef:

    Started smoking early in my teens and gave it up just past my 30th birthday. Was in Spain in a small little restaurant when 2 woman in the early 30's came and joined us and another couple and started to light up on a cigarette. Politely asked them to refrain as spouse has pulmonary problems and was castigated by a remark, "you Japanese think you own the world" and kept on lighting up. Fortunately our haole partners spoke up and clued them in that we were Americans like they were and him being 6'4", they stopped in their tracks.


  6. 4G:

    @BL:

    "I'm just an ordinary person who believes dat doing da right thing is more than a punchline . . ."

    I think this line, alone, makes you a bit more extraordinary than "ordinary". ;)


  7. rayboyjr:

    ... hey Braddah Lance ... more people would step in, if there were little or no threat of violence ...

    ... but if the situation could possibly threaten safety ... then that's where conscience and courage kick in ... some of us have it, some don't ... and I don't think there's a right or wrong response ...

    ... I've done things that I see as dangerous or crazy if I look back at it ... but that's just it ... many times, there's no time for thinking or analyzing ... just reacting ...

    ... thankfully, those tense situations bring out the best in a lot of people ... I thank God for that!!! ...


  8. zzzzzz:

    Just do it, BL. We need more guys like you.


  9. 9th Island Girl:

    I know you can't stand back but the people who reminded you that you're a dad now were just concerned for you.

    Sorry to say I am often more guts than brains and do intercede when I probably shouldn't.