Wassup Wit Dat!

Wat Else Do You Say?

July 27th, 2016

Recently a close friend of mine's just lost da mother of their daughter to cancer. It was an 'expected' passing having already known da prognosis of an inoperable tumor a few years ago and while da last few days were spent in hospice - death is nevah easy. Da ohana seems to be taking it in stride already having been prepped for da moment but still death is nevah a pleasant thing to deal with.

Since I've nevah had a person close to me pass, I can't truly say how I feel about death but wat I can imagine is how many times da survived have heard either "I'm sorry" or "my condolences". Da count is probably off da charts and for every funeral I've attended, I constantly asked myself, wat else do you say? You obviously can't say Wassup Wit Dat! but is there anything else to add in somber moments? I guess das why Hallmark is still around.

Besides maybe sharing a mo'olelo during down time, have you 'said' anything oddah than da standard two phrases? Da funeral line probably isn't da right time to strike up a conversation so maybe da two phrases are 'mandatory' to keep da line moving or if you don't have anything to say? Have you written anything oddah than phrases and maybe a "I'm/We're here for you" on da sympathy card?

Death sucks.... nevah anything 'right' to say.




Posted in WWD! | 9 Comments »

9 Responses to “Wat Else Do You Say?”

  1. hemajang:

    I think just showing up and expressing your condolences is good. At least the person who lost their loved one know you cared enough to say something about the loss. My wife passed away 6 months ago and any kind of acknowledgement of her passing were much appreciated. Some were simple phrases that you hear all the time at funerals or written in sympathy cards and others were thoughtful remembrances, they were all good to me. 6 months later I still have a need to talk about her passing, the grieving never ends in my opinion and expressing your feelings helps in dealing with the loss. Yeah, death sucks ...but no shame, talk about it to your friend, you'll say the "right" thing, he understands and will appreciate it.


  2. Fat Bastard:

    "Stay Strong"


  3. Braddah Lance:

    hemajang - I am so sorry to hear about your wife's passing. You have been a faithful and loyal reader of WWD! since the beginning of time as I am sure you were the same - guaranteed more - for your wife. May each day carry on with new life and continue to keep on keeping on.


  4. NKHEA:

    Howzit hemajang, sorry to hear of your wife's passing, my condolences to you and your family.

    take care


  5. Jeannette:

    Along with the usual "So sorry", "Much sympathy" sayings I usually say that the departed will be missed and I tell the grieving family to remember to take care of themselves. Also that they should not hesitate to call me if there is anything I may do to help them out.


  6. hemajang:

    Mahalo BL and NKHEA. I miss my wife, its only me and my dog in my big house, life goes on.


  7. Cook 'Em:

    hemajang -- Although it's sad you miss your wife, it's also a high compliment to her. We only miss special people. God bless and strengthen you.


  8. cojef:

    hemajang, hang in there and grieving can last a lifetime. I still tear when I think about my Mother, more so than for my 4 brothers, a sister and Dad. Trying to stay alive to care for my 86 years old wife who is suffering with dementia. Have lived with her for over 68 years, though we've been married 65 years last December.


  9. 9th Island Girl:

    So sorry to hear, hemajang. God bless and comfort you.

    BL, many times it doesn't matter what you say, it just matters that you came.


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