It's amazing how quickly time flies by wen you start a new job, have an infant and still got uku-million things fo' do.

Da first quarter of da year is all pau and yesterday was April Fool's - in case you nevah know. While I wasn't able to have any "fun" with my co-workahs (ran out of time setting up one), I certainly felt like I was on da end of one...... of many.

Wen you have three different alarm clock settings and all three blow by plus snoozes, dat should have signaled trouble already. Da Wife and I both got up past 6am (normally up at 4:30-5:00am) and was supah late. Da Baby was wailing and Da Keiki nevah like wake up. Wen I was dropping Da Keiki off at school, da oddah keiki were wearing da school shirt but we nevah get notice to have them wear it so while there were a handful dat wasn't wearing it as well, I thought it was kinda messed up dat da majority was.

Once I get back home and jump on da bike, I roll down my driveway and dis is wat I see.........

Don't see anything yet besides da Band-Aid blocking my address? How's about a bag full of $H!T!

WTF! Wassup Wit Dat!

There are a lot of dog walkers dat travel up and down our street but nevah have I seen dis! There are a couple of new renters with dogs on da street parallel to us and I can only imagine it's them but cannot be certain. Wat I no get is wat kine of dog owners would literally leave $h!t on someone else's property to throw away let alone not even have da manners to throw it away in a trash can which was literally 12 inches away from wea dis person unloaded - pun intended.

I had two dogs for ovah 13 years and not once have I evah done dat. I've walked miles carrying their crap in a bag cause it was MY responsibility. If I evah catch whoevah doing dat, I going follow them home, collect all Da Baby's stinky diapers and leave 'em on their lawn... in a plastic bag of course. Ai-goo.

Of course you're reading WWD! so I not pau yet. While it rained earlier, it cleared up but of course on my way to work Mother Nature must have been pissed at me cause it poured on me in traffic. Naturally it completely stopped once I hit da driveway at work.

Then about an hour latah I get a call from Da Wife saying I have to rush home and pick up Da Baby cause one of da babies at da sitter's has impetigo, a contagious superficial skin infection.

Really? Anything else? All dis was within a three hour period and all I was hoping was someone would jump out and yell, "April Fool's!" - but no one did.

Did anybody get April Fooled yesterday? Were you a prankster or da victim? Wat was da best one you seen or done or witnessed? Are you a good sport about dis kine stuff?

Sadly I'm not immune to being a fool.... no mattah wat day it is.

Ok, I'm pretty surah we get some City & County workahs dat read WWD! and I'm hoping one of you guys can answer dis one. Well take a look at da pic first of da corner at Waimano Home Road and Moanalua Road....







Wat do you see? No, it's not da kine trick wea you gotta stare at da pic and something scary jumps out but if you noticed da painted curb, you noticed wat I noticed. Seriously,

Wassup Wit Dat!

How come it's painted blue? Da only thing I could tink of was to show da handicap people dat it was a curb dat allowed handicapped carts..... but how come not on da oddah side too 'den? Did they run out of paint? How come only one curb wen within a 500ft radius there are about nine oddah curbs with da "ramp" but they aren't painted blue? Das da first time evah I seen one whole portion of a sidewalk painted..... so does dat mean those who aren't handicapped can't stand in da blue zone like in parking lots?

Can anybody figgah dis one out?

Howzit to da WWD! Hui!

Just wanted to throw a quick shout out to all those who normally don't post but found an "alternate" mean of doing so.

A couple of blogs ago in "Bear Witness", dat was da MOST Facebook shares evah! I can't tell if people were sharing - or dissing - da blog but it was shared a whopping 156 times!

Wassup Wit Dat!

I thought da rubbah slippah flashback would have garnered more shares than a pee filed toilet pic but hey, watevah floats (in) your boat.

I sincerely appreciate those who don't/aren't able to normally post a comment - which is EXTREMELY APPRECIATED - but the FB share is equally da same.

I know not all da blogs are interesting or can relate to everyone one crack but it's nice to have one once in awhile hit a nerve with most.

Muchos Mahalos to EVERYBODIES who takes da time to read WWD!......... and post.

If there's one thing Hawai'i get choke of - besides Spam - is rubbah slippahs, NOT flip-flops, RUH-BAH SLIP-PAHS. Or slippahs for short. And unless you go early wen Longs get da sale, chances are no more your size. One day at Old Navy, they had a really cheap sale on slippahs so I bought "back-ups" and it reminded me of dis blog I wrote about back in 2010........ yeah, 2010!

Back in da day, for those who've always wondered, we used to put 'em on our hands fo' run fastah - you know, aerodynamics and all. Actually was cause we nevah like lose 'em and get lickins'. It also came in handy wen playing chase mastah cause you could just slip 'em on and run threw da pokey mine fields.

Da most "experienced" ones could walk out from class wit 'em on and wen recess came, walk down to da field (cause no like get busted for running) and immediately go into a dead on full sprint - and da slippahs? It would fly right off like Forrest Gump's braces. Da draw back? You ALWAYS ended up looking for one side or da more common scenario, somebody wen cockaroach your slippahs cause wen look like theirs. Then you go home and get lickins'.

Rubbah slippahs are notorious for breaking but of course - being da resourceful kama'aina we are - we ALL knew how fo' MacGyver da buggahs back - even da wahines! I tink das one requirement fo' being one kama'aina. Wen da buggah pop out we jus' wen slide 'em back in and if da buggah came "too loose"..... duct tape! Well, any kine tape. Masking tape, scotch tape, even staples and papah clips but gotta make surah da sharp side points down!

Everyone - except da wahines I tink - used to wear 'em till was papah thin and it was kinda one treat fo' go and buy new ones. If we saw any kid wit "Scott's" on we was jealous cause those were like da Mercedes of slippahs. A hybrid of sorts, rubbah on bottom but thick fabric on top. Now repairing those were tough but it's amazing wat super glue and duct tape could do.

Back then to now, still get da rubbah slippahs but now get da fancy shmancy kine. HIC (Hawaiian Island Creations) was/still is da premier "fashion trend setter" of da rubbah slippahs. You could custom make your own! How cool was dat! It was - not surah about now - da cool thing to mix and match da colors so your pair actually didn't look like it was a pair. You could pick a different color top from da bottom and literally have four colors on a pair of slippahs. Da trouble wit dat? Wen you stay someone's house wit choke people, da only way to find your's was by putting 'em on and doing da footprint identification test. If you evah questioned if it was your slippah or not, it was by how your heel and toes lined up in da permanent indents in da rubbah.

Years ago, my team must have felt real bad for me cause I used to come in these boro boro "regulah" rubbah slippahs. As a coach's gift, they bought da fancy shmancy Quicksilver kine slippahs and I was really touched cause I nevah evah had "fancy" slippahs even as an adult. I really cherished those so I nevah wore 'em out to anyplace I knew was going get dirty - not even to practice. I only wore 'em out to "special places".

A couple years latah my dog ate 'em. Really. No joke.....

But I still wore 'em.

It was hanging on by just a single seam and my foot would slip if was wet so I couldn't go fastah than a walk. As such, it was "demoted" to be worn as "practice slippahs". My playahs teased me throughout da season and whaddayaknow, at da end of da season I got a pair of MORE fancy shmancy kine Quicksilver slippahs..... it had air pockets in da heel like Nike Air's AND a bottle opener on da bottom!

Whoa! Can run & open my "beverage" without skipping a beat. MacGyver would be impressed. Those were da only slippahs evah to have a spot indoors on our "shoe" rack.

About a year latah.......

My oddah dog ate 'em.

Wassup Wit Dat!

Ai-goo. No can win I tell ya, no can win.

So wat? you get fancy shmancy kine slippahs? HIC or Long's kine? How many pairs do you actually have? Do you keep da broken ones for spare parts? No scade and share your rubbah slippah mo'olelo's.

I trip out about public bathrooms cause it must be, all those who "miss", must nevah have cleaned a toilet before. I cannot believe how many guys no can aim.

Wassup Wit Dat!

C'mon man, seriously. Hold, point, shoot. No mattah how big or small your weapon may be, you no can miss one target dat close and dat wide open... unless you get da kine split stream action happening but even then you turn into one firefighter, control da hose and get 'em undah control.

No mattah wea a guy goes it's highly unlikely dat you'd be sharing a stall or urinal but even moreso have a spectator watching you. Wat if dat spectator was your keiki? Would you subject him/her to "watch" you go numbah one or numbah two? Or even bear witness to da noises guys make in da lua while unloading their waste?









It's actually a great concept wea you don't have to worry about leaving your keiki outside with strangers if you're alone or wondah if they'll still be wea you left them as you urgently find a stall to relieve yourself... but still, I tink dis form of abuse is something I would be glad to share with my keiki should they evah decide to misbehave. Have you evah used one of these? You tink it's "humane"? Dunno about you but I can't even imagine how unsanitary that seat is as I'm surah you're not washing your hands before unlocking your keiki.

Hey, it's a Monday, I had a crappy week/weekend and das all I got.